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How can we let go when we mess up or when something we don’t like is done or said to us?
If you tend to ruminate about what you said or did, after a social gathering or a meeting of sorts, and/or you replay scenarios over and over wishing you had said something different or even rehearsing something you wish you said, then tune n in to this week’s episode.
You’re not alone if you can relate! So many of us can get stuck by spinning the story of what happened in our heads. This, of course, is not helpful. The meaning we assign is not useful, and it doesn’t serve us.
When we feel justified and we know we’re in the right, we may hold a grudge for years; but this behavior is only hurting ourselves. Stripping the story to the bare facts– without our interpretation or what we think it must mean– can give us a helpful perspective. We suggest writing down what happened and how you feel. There’s a plethora of research pointing to the amazing benefits of journaling. A question that may help us gain insight is What do you want the outcome of that situation to be? How do you want to feel about it?
Oftentimes, the most obvious answer is we want to feel empowered. But, we give our power away when we allow the situation or person to determine how we feel. If you’re aware of how you want to feel, but choose to stay in that negative spiral don’t judge yourself.
Observe the behavior with curiosity and remember a few things:
- As long as we’re alive we will always mess up – It’s what it means to have a human experience.
- No one’s thinking about our “mess” more than us as we tend to be our own worst critic
- Show yourself grace and have your own back. Perhaps you need to process that hard feeling by letting it in and letting it run its course.
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Original Music by: Matthew Dotson
Cover Art by: Nate Rapai
[Disclaimer: Any views or opinions expressed in this podcast are those of the hosts and guests and do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of any educational institutions or organizations. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. The hosts are not licensed therapists and their opinion does not substitute the advice of a physician or other qualified professional]